this blogpost is related to my first youtube video, where i've been answering questions that i've got sent regarding my shopping addiction and my bad debt.
1. how did it start?
it all began in the end of 2018/beginning of 2019, after something traumatizing happened to me back then. i just didn't feel good in any clothes that i've worn, so i started to shop more and more and more. after a short period of time, i've discovered the option 'buy now pay later' and shortly after that, i've discovered that it's also possible, to pay my clothes in monthly rates.
this options made it pretty easy for me to continue my online-shopping spree and sooner or later, i would have lost control over it.
2. what happens after you've been reminded twice that you still need to pay?
a lot of times, i personally, got reminded a third time. but in some other cases the third reminder came straight from a collection business.
3. what is the difference between regular purchases on account and purchases made with klarna?
tbh, i don't know if there is any difference. you can pay directly via your account or with klarna. in fact; you pay directly. doesn't matter if it's your bank account or your klarna account.
4. how could you pay for designer pieces, if you've already been in debt?
i couldn't, actually. i've used to 'skip' a few monthly rates and just used the money (that i've actually needed to pay my monthly rates lol) for designer stuff.
do yourself a favor and never do it like that. please <3
5. have you been aware off all the money that you owe those companies?
i'm not sure if aware is the right word to use here. of course i knew somehow, that i need to pay them, anytime, better sooner than later. but like i said, aware isn't the word that i would use for this.
6. how did you feel when you've realized that you just cannot do it anymore?
like a piece of sh*t :)
7. did your family ever noticed anything?
they for sure did. but since i do not want to involve my family in any of this, i'm not telling anything else about it. sorry x
8. how long have you been carrying all of this bad debt?
since 3 years i guess. well, i have not been in debt with 22k from the start. but 3 years ago i've started to shop like a crazy demon, so yeah.
9. starting from now on, how long does it take until you can apply for loans or credits again?
seriously, i have no idea. we will see.
10. when did the debt became a problem and stopped being 'just an issue' anymore?
by the time i've sat down and calculated everything. that's when i've realized "well f*ck".
11. have some people turned their backs on you?
read next question for an answer.
12. what did your friends say about this whole situation you're in?
(that's actually worth another youtube video some day) the answer is: nothing.
why nothing? because they do not know about any of this. i've blocked them.
i think i've blocked around 400 people on my social media accounts, from instagram to tiktok.
why is that? because i've just wanted to be myself. i stutter and speaking for myself in front of others is simply not that easy for me. when i've recognized that my stutter kinda disappears as soon as i speak to a camera, i knew that social media IS the thing that i NEED to do, to become happy. but people will talk. it's a fact and it's just a matter of time people from my hometown will find out about all of this. but it's okay. i guess... 0_0
13. does it make sense to settle my klarna finances to the anyfin app?
i don't know. i've heard about anyfin a few times, but i did not use it.
14. when did you finally realize that you're in bad debt?
i've really for real fully for sure realized it at the time i've got in touch with a debt counseling.
15. did you also payed stuff like holiday trips with monthly rates/credit?
nope. 99% out of all my debt is straight from buying clothes. i think it's crazy that you can pay stuff like this (wether it's clothing or holiday trips) on monthly rates.
16. are you getting any help?
yes, the help i'm getting is the debt counseling that i'm in touch with.
17. how do i get rid of a shopping addiction?
i have no idea. i cannot speak for everyone who suffers from this kind of addiction BUT i can promise you, as soon as it 'clicks' inside of you and your brain (i'm talking about the breaking point where you just realize what the actual f you've been doing) you CAN and you WILL get rid of it. sounds a bit easy, i know. but that's what i personally experienced.
18. how do you deal with all of this?
first; thank you for the question <3 currently i'm dealing pretty good with everything. it's definitely been worse a few months ago. but now, i just know, it will get better.
19. can you delete an account on klarna?
you can delete the app. and i guess, when you delete the app, your data gets kinda erased too. but i'm not quite sure about that. so better get in touch with their service-team!
20. what does it feel like to not buy anything? maybe like a drug withdrawal?
i would not compare, what i am going through right now, with a drug withdrawal. i think it's a bit different. sometimes it's hard to look at clothing online, seeing something you really like, but knowing 'nope, you cannot go for it', but eventually you'll get over it.